Just caught an old episode of The Practice on telly. It was the episode where Bobby asked Lindsay to marry him, with Helen eavesdropping in the background. Lindsay was in hospital, having just recoved from a stabbing.
There are times it takes the very real prospect of losing something to realise its true value, and a conversation I had with Faith this morning revolved around whether or not getting married was the right thing to do.
I know it sounds silly to many of you. We’ve the date set, we’ve booked the dinner place and we’ve even designed the invitation. I’ve never done this whole wedding thing before, but I think I can safely say that the doubts Faith and I discussed are not unique to the both of us. After all, marriage is a huge change from the status quo, and human beings as a species have never been very good at dealing with change.
My sister asked me a week ago why people bothered to get married. With the divorce rate and the pain that can be found in so many long-term relationships, why would anyone go through all the trouble? Being and older brother, I didn’t want to feed the sceptic in her. But more importantly, being a man on the verge of stepping over the threshold into a new life with Faith, I wanted to know for sure.
And these are the things I know.
I am thankful for every single moment spent with you. Every single moment. The times we laughed, cried, quarelled, prayed, talked, kept silent…the times we just were. I would be lying if I said I’ve never felt the temptation to “do my own thing”, but as I examine my own heart I know that I wouldn’t want to do my own thing without you by my side.
I’m aware of the transience of human life - its fleeting nature, and how soon all this will be over. But I want to capture the spark of the moment, and with you everything seems to move in slow-motion and in double-time…all at once. And in that moment, despite our weaknesses and failings we will find something beautiful that exists solely in the fact that God is who He is.
I want to marvel at the moment with you, holding your hand in mine.
I want you to be my wife…so very, very much.
God loves you. And I can see exactly why.