Submission
These past few months of musing over job opportunities has run me ragged. I have not applied indiscriminately for many jobs, and the ones that really caught my eye never came back to me.
I’ve mentioned my thoughts of starting my own web design agency. I am thankful for Faith, who has been a more wonderful wife than I ever dreamed anyone could be. Instead of chiding me for my financial “discontributions”, she asks me to take the time I need to live out my own ideals.
I have seen the work of many web design companies here in Singapore and there are times I stand appalled at the lack of quality. In my mind I lay down rules for my yet imaginary company: things I should do; and things I shouldn’t.
But I am reminded that my life is in God’s hands. Not only for His provision, but for His pleasure. It is to be used as He sees fit. I sometimes beg that my lofty plans of opening my little web design bakery falls within His plans for me, but I know God doesn’t work that way.
My all has to be laid on His altar. My dreams, my hopes, my ambitions. My skills, my life. The song “Is Your All On The Altar?” goes:
Is your all on the altar of sacrifice laid, your heart, does the Spirit control?
A life with Christ means a life for Christ. My dad named me “Lucian” after a preacher whose words touched his life. Though my memory of it is vague, I seem to remember that the name came with hopes that I’d be a missionary too. Those hopes gave way to pragmatism somewhere along the way and were never uttered again.
Lord, I yield you my body and soul. There is nothing hidden from you. I hold on to the ashes of an Adamic life and I taste its futility. I only ask that You take me wherever You lead. I leave my nets behind. I want so much to follow.
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I pray with you lucian, that all things turn out the way the Lord wants it to be and perhaps even more.
Just wanted to take a moment to praise God for your humility. Being completely faithful in your heart as well as your mind is very admirable. I thank my blessed Father for using you as an overflowing vessel, so that you might reach those who are lost in the desert searching for the burning bush that they were sent out to find. I will lift you daily in my prayers to the Maker of the way, the way to truth, light, peace, hope, faith, love and the possiblity of being. Now that you have seen the light and have been touched by Our Father himself in all His majesty and glory, never forget to remember. Remember the moment you knew who you are in Christ and that His plans were set for you before you were even born. Thank Him for the path that led you here and regardless of how you justify your existance or the circumstances that lead you to your revelations, know that the footsteps that you followed were made by Jesus who has carried us all. For once you are one of the chosen few you die to the flesh and are born again to the Holy Spirit and Christ lives in you and you with Him. Once you have experienced the true meaning of hope peace faith joy and love, you can then begin to follow the life that was truely meant for you. Praise God, and may the Holy Spirit continue to be a lamp lighting the way in your darker times. There is no need to fear them once you know there is never anything in the light that can stay dark, it either comes into the light and casts shadows of memories of a life that was left behind, or it flees from your side because nothing dark can survive the light without being exposed as being darkness itself. Feel free to call upon His name in your times of weakness and remember that there are those people in your life who now share your memories, life, and faith in the Lord who will remind you that you are fearfully and wonderfully made, there is no one like you and your are accepted and loved for who God made you to be.
Congradulations on being true to your Faith and listening when nothing else seemed to make sense. I look forward to seeing what becomes of you and your writing now that you have let go and let God. You are now amoung the spiritual lamplighters and your unique ways of writing and expressing yourself will help others come to Christ. Fullfilling your destiny. Please keep me in mind as you discover you ministry and share your testimonies, sharing in others trials and victories is what keeps us close to God and ourselves. May you find renewed hope, peace, faith, and love in your journey through life.
In Christ Jesus, Ruth
AKA MMF36
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