Five Star Parents, Created By A Five Star God

My parents sent me a virtual card today. They wished me happy birthday, which is in two days. While their show of affection didn't catch me by surprise, their choice of card did. It reads "To a five star kid". I am hardly a five star kid. If you have read my previous journals you would have known that I was a terrible child, now that I see in retrospect. I wasn't terribly motivated to complete schoolwork, whether for myself or for my parents. I fell in the bottom five of class rankings every single year. As my Chinese heritage would have expected of me, I failed to bring glory, or in my case failed to not bring disgrace to my family. Of course I had my share of beatings and rebuke. If I had a child like myself then, I would have done the same, if not worse. I have so much to thank God for – my parents never gave up on me.
Today, I still don't think of myself as a five star kid. I scored 4 "A"s in my PSLE, a major exam at elementary school level for those of you who aren't familiar with the Singaporean education system. That in itself was a miracle. All around me, I had friends scoring A-stars, a huge notch above the A. I was happy for my As for my teachers were expecting me to fail Chinese and maybe even Mathematics. I was a mediocre child, never doing anything great. No Science Olympiad Gold medals, no great academic recognition. Yet I know that every child is not mediocre, that in every child lies life. And life is never mediocre. It is always fascinating, whether dark or light. Maybe that is what my parents saw, and maybe that gave them strength. Today, I have a short list of accomplishments to my name, yet it is my burden not to be proud. It is too easy to revel in the self and become narcissistic. It is not easy, and often I have to bear in mind that all that I have is a gift from God, that I may be faithful in using it, or even laying it down for His glory.
Dearest Lord, I come before you as I am, tainted and full of pride. Help me decrease that You may increase. Forgive me for so many times I have put myself in first place, forgetting You and those whom You love. Help me be a good reflection of who You are. Create in me a clean heart. Thank you for all the things You've given me. Wonderful parents, beautiful friends, a loving church. Thank You so much.

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