<blockquote>"No man is an island"
-Some wiseguy
"Better to have love and lost than never to have loved at all"
-Some other wiseguy</blockquote>
Had dinner with Anne, Pauline, Helen, Mike and Paul tonight. Though they are not longtime friends from yesteryear, I feel a close attachment has been forged tonight. Friendship would have been too casual a word.
It would have been easier to watch life from a distance, given the transitivity of college life. Much as I would have it otherwise, it would be very hard to keep these companions as the lifelong next-door neighbour we all would like our closest friends to be. Coming to America has opened up a new dimension of social interaction to me. I have never had to deal with geographical limitations ever before. Sure, I've had friends come and go, but it was more because we've all moved on to different stages in life. Tonight I saw in them friends I would have liked to keep in my life for its entire duration, and the almost inevitable prospect of being geographically apart rips at my heart. Its steady beating and the rush of warm blood that flows through it beckons me to dive into the moment and love these people with all the strength that is within, but in my mind's eye I know that tears will be shed, and pain felt when the time comes for us to end a physical face-to-face relationship. Emails and phonecalls won't make it the same. They never do.
So I stand here at a new crossroad. Should I avoid the catastrophe that comes inevitably with love, or spend my days here in Tucson not truly knowing any?
I place my chips on the table. I will play.
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