I've become a victim of the post-browser-war syndrome. For those of you non-geek kinds, the browser wars happened not too long ago, in a galaxy far far away…oh wait, that was another war.
It was a time when Netscape ruled the world with a benevolent hand, and all was good. The grass was lush and green, and the antelopes roamed the fields. Everything was in balance – the circle of life was in harmony. We celebrated the success of the nimble and innovative.
But it would not always be so. The dominant Empire that was Microsoft would see the potential that lay within the browser and embark on a crusade to reap its benefits. Netscape would have to die.
Microsoft did this by producing the <s>Internet Explorer</s> Death Star, and included functionalities within it that Netscape did not have in order to rally the support of the masses unto its side. Netscape retaliated with unique functionalities of its own. The two main browsers began to diverge, each on looking for a foothold that would enable it to trample the other.
So I, a simple <s>web developer</s> peasant toiling endlessly on the moons of Endor, have become a casualty of the war. Extended hours of labour are needed to ensure that my harvests display equally well in both browsers. It feels almost like having to speak in multiple languages at the same time and yet not making my point known to those who would only read in the obscure dialects of Opera or Mosaic.
The tips of my fingers are blistered and my retinas are seared from the radiation of the 19". I've succeeded in being the faithful interpreter for Microsoft and Mozilla / Netscape.
But hark, the sound of IE version 5.5 users' moans can be heard throughout the land. "Margins don't line up" they cry. "Your sidebar sucks in grey!" I crawl out of my bed and back to my old plough (Pentium 3 500mhz <em>is</em> old).
I give up. I will not teach the illiterate to read! Who cares about us peasants?
Hail, the <a href="">warriors</a> of the <a href="">web standards project</a>! They have come to save us!
Maybe there's hope after all. In the meantime, upgrade your browsers and hang in there. It's going to be a hell of a ride.

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