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Unfamiliar Territories

I'll confess: there's a scary element to marriage.
Ever notice how couples seem to become distant after getting married to each other? Or how they begin to take things for granted, and no longer mutter sweet nothings? The prevalence of these examples scares me.
It scares me because I've spent most of my life (adult and adolescent) hoping to marry Faith. In the years that past I made up my mind about the type of boyfriend I wanted to be to her, and thought up countless sweet gestures to win her heart. Whether conscious or subconscious, all the planning cumulated to the wedding day, when all my hopes and dreams would become reality.
I'm less prepared for what lies after. Somehow somewhere in the back of my mind I didn't dare believe that I would one day marry the girl I loved so much. It was much easier loving her from a distance. One could hardly do any wrong there.
Now I face the weight of my own expectation – I've always wanted nothing but the best for her, and now I need to be the best. I want courtship to never end, and for us to be able to always love each other with childlike faith. There are times the expectations seem unsurmountable, and yet there are times loving her seems so natural a reaction.
How did we cope before fire was invented? What did people fall in love before telephones came about? How do people tolerate surfing on a dialup connection (which by the way I'm still using)?
There are thresholds in life we pass only to forget what lay behind us, however close. Faith went back to her parents' for the night as she had to finish up some work. It's only been a few days, but I don't know how I ever slept without the smell of her hair on my pillow.

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