All Stubbed Up

The whole family is down with the flu, and the ubiquity of the H1N1 news in the media does add that tinge of fear, I must admit. We've seen the family doctor but no tests were taken to determine if it is flying pig syndrome we're suffering from.
Faith somehow managed to will herself out of falling sick. I've always known her to be a superwoman and all that, but this really takes the cake. Caleb and I have the perpetual runny nose and Anne has a cough that would rival the Marlboro Man's. None of us has really come down with a fever, so that is something to thank God for.
Probably the result of the flu medicine, but the possibility of losing one of the kiddos to the bug isn't lost on me. I just spent the last half hour applying vapor-rub to Anne's chest as she repeated attempted to cough her lungs out. I lay there in the dark, soothing the girl to sleep as my brain recalibrated its place in the universe. Life and death — the very basics of existence we've struggled with through all of humankind — is something we still have no control over. For all the intellectual debate, all the scientific rants, all the technological achievements we've made, we are (in biblical terms) unable to make a single hair on our head black or white.
There comes a time to surrender the intellect, and it isn't borne out of a defeatist attitude. It <em>feels</em> right to cede that the really important things in life are in the hands of God. You could say that it is the feeling that comes with using a crutch; but honestly, it feels more like the realisation that it is the air currents that bears the wings to soar, and endless flapping is a poor substitute.

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